Have you ever paused to think about the words you use when talking about your company? Do you naturally say we in conversation when referring to the company, or do you find yourself saying they? This seemingly small, unconscious choice of words can reveal a great deal about your personal engagement with your company’s values, objectives, and culture.
Over my 25 years as a partner at Borderless Executive Search, I’ve observed this linguistic nuance countless times in conversations with candidates. They can be simple yet powerful indicators of how connected, or disconnected you feel from your organisation. And it’s worth reflecting on what it might say about you.
What “We” Says About You
When you refer to your company as we, it signals alignment and ownership. It shows that you see yourself as part of the organisation, that its successes are your successes, and that its challenges are yours to tackle. Using we suggests pride in being part of something bigger than yourself, a shared mission or purpose.
This choice of words reflects emotional investment. It shows that you identify with the company’s values and objectives on a personal level. You’re not just working for the company; you’re working with it, you’re confident in being part of its story.
For leaders, listening carefully whether employees use we or they in everyday conversation offers a subtle yet powerful insight into their level of engagement. This simple linguistic cue can reveal how connected employees feel to the organisation.
What “They” Reveals
On the other hand, referring to your company as they can suggest a degree of detachment. It may indicate that you feel dissociated from the organisation’s goals or culture. Perhaps you see yourself as an outsider looking in, or maybe you’re disillusioned with the company’s direction or leadership.
This shift from we to they is generally unconscious but telling. It can happen gradually, perhaps due to changes in leadership, personal circumstances, or abruptly after a significant event like restructuring. It can reflect a disengagement from the emotional connection that once tied you to the organisation.
The Nuance of Teams vs. The Organisation
It’s important to recognise that this dynamic doesn’t apply uniformly across all aspects of work life. Identifying as we within a team can reflect a strong commitment to colleagues and shared goals at a local level, even while referring to the company as they.
This nuance highlights how engagement isn’t always clear-cut and can depend on context. A person might feel deeply invested in their immediate team while feeling disconnected from the larger organisation.
Transition After Leaving a Role
These simple words can reveal where someone stands after recently leaving an employer. For instance, if you’ve moved on but still find yourself saying we when talking about your former company, it might suggest a lingering attachment to your previous role or team, a natural part of moving on from something meaningful. Reflecting on this connection might offer valuable insights into your readiness for change.
Conversely, if you’re using they, it could indicate why you left or that you’ve processed the separation. The transition from we to they is particularly important if your departure wasn’t voluntary, such as in a case of redundancy. It takes time to detach emotionally and become clear about what’s next.
Why This Matters
Reflecting on this unconscious choice of words can be incredibly revealing. It’s not just about how others perceive your engagement, it’s about understanding yourself. Are you truly aligned with your current company’s values and objectives? Or are you disconnecting? If you’ve recently left a role, are you emotionally ready for the next step in your career?
These questions are worth asking because they tap into how engaged or disengaged you are with your work and how ready you are for change. Recognising the patterns in your use of language can help you assess where you stand and what steps to take next.
A Personal Reflection
I’ve seen this dynamic play out not just in others but also in my earlier career. I’ve worked in organisations that were they, places where I felt ill at ease that evolved into we companies through engaging leadership and shared purpose. I’ve also experienced the reverse: companies that ‘relapsed’ to being they organisations after leadership changes. These transitions had a profound impact on my sense of belonging and commitment.
At the same time, I’ve noticed how my connection to specific teams has often remained strong even when my relationship with the broader organisation faltered. Those smaller groups, where collaboration was genuine and shared goals were clear, often felt like islands of engagement within larger seas of detachment.
Language is more than communication; it reveals where our loyalties and emotions truly lie. The words we choose reflect our inner state, our pride, our frustrations, and our hopes. They shape how we relate to those around us. So, the next time you’re chatting with colleagues or reflecting on a former employer, pay attention to whether it’s we or they. The answers may surprise you and provide some fresh insight into your true feelings.
Andrew Kris, Borderless Executive Search
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